Finding my Inner Light

Today's lesson:  Be careful where you put your hands after you've handled jalapenos.


*insert wry laugh here*


Yesterday, Tamara was making nachos with beans, cheese, cilantro and olives, and she asked me to cut up some jalapenos and de-seed them to remove most of their heat.  I cut the jalapenos in half, then removed the inner seeds with my hands.  I got an itch on my right eye, and without thinking, scratched it with my right hand.

Thus starts the pebble to the avalanche.


My "itch" starts burning. I'm thinking, "Oh crap, I got some jalapeno oil on me, I better wash it off."  So I go to the kitchen, wash my hands AGAIN, then get some small amount of soap and wash my "itch" which has now grown into a full blown heat.  After washing my face with the soap, I splash my face with running water, and instead of getting a towel to dry my face off, I use my hands. 

Big mistake.

There was some residual oil left from the seeds on my hands, and almost immediately, my right eye turned into a raging inferno of hell.  OK, maybe that's a gross exaggeration, but it certainly felt that way. I started writhing around in pain (wouldn't you, if your eye felt like a raging inferno?), and Tamara rushes me to the bathroom and turns on the shower to full blast cold water, which I immediately jump in, clothes and all.  Dousing my inferno (yes, yes, it really felt like that) with what seemed to be mere droplets of water that offered small relief, I take in deep gulps of air in an effort to stave off the intense feeling welling within me.  Time seemed to be the only recourse.


Word of advice.

Get a food processor.